Remember the day you jumped in the pool with all your clothes on....

Yes, This happened to me. I don't want to talk about then other then we are all fine. Super funny... maybe someday, it might be. This has been a rough week. Things are changing and I'm not sure I like it. One part of me is totally ok with the rhythm of life. The changes of the seasons. Bt the other half fights to hold on. To blow back at the winds when they threaten to blow in a new season of my life.

My baby boy is one at the end of the month. I am so happy about this. He is my last baby and I am so ok with that. I have drank in every ounce of his sweet babiness. The way his head smells after a bath. His big blue eyes, The way he giggles when I blow on his tummy. But I am ok with saying goodbye to sleepless nights, lugging a 25 pound diaper bag with me everywhere I go, and heavy strollers hogging all the trunk room in my car. ok, so I know some of thesse things I am not giving up because he is one, but we are one year closer.

Then next month my girls have birthdays. Lexi will be 12! 12... Such a great age. So many things changing. Struggling to be a kid and a young adult. I love this kid so much. This kid changed my life. She made me a mom. Even though lately I am pretty sure she hates me. I keep telling myself its normal, but its hard.

Ashlynn will be 9! This is a fantastic age I have decided. She is definitely still a kid. She spends hours playing with Monster high dolls and her new BFF Piper. Her imagination is fantastic and her computer skills are better then mine I think 9 is an age I want to bottle up and keep forever.

Myka will be 4! This is an age I cant wait to see on her. cause honestly this kid does nothing half way. She is going to be four in full effect. She is a princess, pop star, karate master , and soccer player all rolled into one. She also thinks she can swim. I assure you she can not. See my title....

I am feeling a little emo tonight. I am loving my kids and my family. We are going camping tomorrow and words can not express how excited I am to leave behind the scalding Arizona heat for a few days of relief.

Will check in later this week from the cool Mountains of Arizona.

I would like some cheese with my whine

I may crack.
Summer may do me in.
Kids stuck inside with nothing to do.
Despite my best pintrest intentions the heat is rising.

Today was rough. It was all i could do to muster up the will power to go to the store. Its hard to go outside and feel like the air is suffocating you and your children.
I know I whine a lot about the weather on here. Its more then just the hot temps here in Phoenix. Its a discontentment in my soul. a longing to give my kids the same experiences I had as a child. Will said once that I needed to remember that my childhood was mine and theirs was theirs. That they will have happy memories, and I shouldn't think that because It didn't look like mine it wasn't good still. I have been thinking a lot about his words and while, I think there is a lot of wisdom in it I also think its really normal to want to share your past with your kids. To want them to feel a connection to you when you were their age.

I need to learn to be content with this. I am praying that God will show me a way. I think the desire to not settle in the desert is from him. But its being made very clear that the Desert is where I am meant to be for now.

Please God let me stop hating it.

I do feel like I need to clarify that while I hate the climate i adore the people. I have some fantastic friends and family here. Thats what I need to focus my thoughts on.

and cute babies with THREE new teeth